Fields are green

My doctor sent me a letter on friday. It was a leaflet for the new doctor i'm getting. Added to it, was a tiny slip of paper filled with the words 'All the best Jess, Take care, Jo.' I don't know why but it made me tear up.



I think it's because she actually did help a little despite me disliking her. I realised alot, such as I didn't cause my mum and Carlton to get divorced. I didn't cause her miscarriage. I do put too much pressure on myself.



Plus, after these 8 - 10 sessions, I'll be free. I might be a better person. I'll have to stand by myself; that's both a liberating and scary thought. I'm still worried I'll fail.



Things are getting better though. I have my first exam tomorrow and yeah, I'm panicking...but I feel confident. Maybe it'l be okay.



Ooh, I went to Bolton Abbey yesterday. It was so beautiful. I caught sun and relaxed, revised and generally had a lovely time. I wish I could spend the rest of my life just laying in the grass under the sun.