Going to a chapel and.....

I went to a wedding party today. it was shit. 

apparently i sat there, just 'posing' the whole time. Tbh, i probably just looked pissed off. ;)

In my opinion, the whole thing looked like a bad scene out of a crap movie. 

The dj played loads of mega cheesy tunes, the priest ate all the chocolate cake and the food looked disgusting. :/

I guess it's cute that a marriage happened though.

So at about 4, we escaped. Then it got really emotional..for me anyway. I gave my grandad a hug...(i never get close to people) and he kissed my cheek. Then he told me he loved me and said he wanted to meet my boyfriend to check he was good enough for me. I couldn't say anything, i was too busy trying to hold back the tears. 

I probably sound really stupid but like i said earlier, i don't get close to people because i'm used to them running away from me..so to save myself from getting hurt, i immediately detach. 

That's why being with MH scares me; cz i haven't stayed at arms length, i got up,close and personal.

I know i'm going to get hurt eventually.

Anyway, back to my grandad. He has cancer & so does his wife. He keeps fighting it but she's not doing too well and our family knows that once she goes, he'll be right out after her. 

So today, after 8 years of no physical contact, i hugged him. 

Pretty hard for me to do. But i did it.

 It could be the last hug i get.

Ha this is depressing aint it. I'm sorry.

Whilst were on the topic of love and family, its valentines day soon. 

Guess what i'm getting ;)

Oooh. 

It's becoming more obvious that MH's ex -Torrez - is most definitely trying to break us up. Just little things she does or says, but it's there & it's noticeable.

I kinda feel sorry for her because she really does love him still...but he's with me now. Me!!

Yeah, if you'd have said last year that this would be happening, that i'd be this happy, i would have laughed at you...but here i am, happy as larry. (again with the larry guy...who is he?)

So anyway, as lovely as she is, she needs to get over him because he's not going to love her again;not anytime soon.

I sound so selfish...but right now, life feels perfect.

xxx